Item - November 8, 1930 - Letter from Demetrius to Thomas

• English
• Ukrainian

[envelope]:

Monsieur D.O. Macko
P.O. Box 209 Coleman, Alta
Canada

[on reverse]:

Ret. To: Fedir Macko, Roznow
P. Kosów. Małopolska

November 8, 1930.
My dear brother!
I want to describe to You my situation, both the past and current one. I got married; I had a wedding on the 25 of the last month.
Did you get my invitation or not? I wrote to You that I would describe You everything in detail after the wedding. So, now I want to describe it, but I am asking for a reply.
I was serving in Zabolotiv last year, then I returned home, and I wrote to you about how things were. So, I came home and started thinking about how I should live my life. It is too late to be a servant, it’s too hard to get to Canada, for I hear that it’s a big unemployment over there and so on, and I couldn’t go there by myself. So, I started thinking and asking around where I could get married. I started figuring out where to marry for land, but no luck. Where it would be okay, there was a problem with me having little land. Where there is a girl that has land, then there are lots of guys to ask for her hand. Everybody wants her. Well, at times I thought to myself that maybe I would not get married. But it is impossible to live in the same house with the father. So, I planned to get married this autumn. I told the father last year I would be getting married this year.
And I started getting married. My uncle Mikhialo, the husband of aunt An., told me that there was a widow in Chiplyntsi, so maybe I should marry her and so on. She had two children from her first husband. She has three morgens of land – one morgen is hers and two others are children’s; a cow, horse, barn, house and chickencoop. Well, I do not really want to marry a widow, but what can I do. I have to get married. I went to her for the observation. Well, the woman liked me so much that she is ready to accept me even with a small dowry. But the thing is that I did not like her at all.
But I thought to myself: if there is no other place to go to, then I will marry the widow.

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When we were at the observation, the woman said to come in two weeks for the agreement, so that we would get a wedding soon. Well, I do not have any desire for this woman. First of all, she was 35 years old, quite old; second of all, there are two children. It’s bad, for I want a girl of my own age. I think to myself, I am not responding to her now and will look for another girl; if I find one – good, if not – then not. But I was thinking about this girl for a long time, but I did not tell her anything, for she is too wealthy for me, and from a big family. She has two married sisters. One is married to the deputy of our vit. Another one is also married to a respectable wealthy man. Although I did not try many matchmakers. But I think that I will try to marry this girl. Maybe it works out, but if not then not. Well, although I have not yet spoken to the girl, I know that she would marry me. The problem is that her relatives want a big dowry because many matchmakers visited this girl and they had one morgen and the cattle, or two morgens. I think, how can I aspire to three morgens while having just half a morgen. But be it as it may. I will try without delay, since in two weeks there is the agreement with that woman, no way out. I sent a man to talk about me with the girl and her old man. Although I did not talk to the girl myself but I knew that she would be willing to marry me, for girls wanted to marry me. I am handsome and try hard to seem respectable. Well, this man whom I sent talked first to the girl. The girl said that she would be willing; then he started talking to the old man. And the old man said, “Let the lad come so that we could see him, for we don’t know him” and so on.

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So, on Thursday I went to ask for her hand, i.e, to appear before the parents; I went alone. But nobody knows at home that I make a second attempt at getting married. I came, greeted them, kissed their hands. We talked a little and then, aha! started to talk about marriage. The old man tells me, “You have a brother in Canada, right?” – “I have”. – “Does he write?” I say, “He does”. – “And he sends you something?” – I say, “Yes, he does”. – And he says, “What job does he have there? I heard that he is some kind of an officer, is that true?” – I say, “Yes, that’s true; he went to schools there and has already got a big position; he used to be a cashier, and now he is an auditor”. Although I do not know that but I said so. The old man says, “Hey, dear, how much does he make a month?” – I say, “300 dollars a month”. – “Oh, dear me. And do you have another married brother here?” – I say, “Yes, I have”. – “And how much land did he married into?” – I say, “Into three morgens”. And here I am all lying, sorry, for there is no other way out; Mikhialo married only into two morgens. – “And how much did he inherit from the father?” – I say, “Three quarters”. – “So, you also have only three quarters?” – I say, “Yes, three, but it’s only through mother that we have 6; we get nothing yet from the father”. – “Oh, that’s little, my son; you have to have two morgens”. – I say, “If you want, my father may give me one more quarter under the mountain. I will talk to my father, so we’ll see if something turns out”. I left. Next Sunday I went to the church, and when we were exiting, the girl came to me and said, “Fedir, you need to be today in the town; I need to tell you something important”. Then I went to the town, and she was waiting for me; and she was so much willing to marry me that she did not know what to do.

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We talked a little, and she said that she would not marry other man. Good! And here the Sunday came that I have to go to the woman for the agreement. And we got a message from the girl’s family to come to them for the agreement. Only then did I start telling the father about where I was and what we discussed, and so on. I took uncle Mikhial and my dad, and we went to the agreement. Well, we started talking a little, and then the old men started talking about this case, and they cannot come to an agreement regarding the dowry. When the girl realized that nothing is going to happen, she started crying and went outside.
The dad was giving only half in Lazy and nothing else, not even a calf, nothing. Well, the girl’s relatives say, “We had over 20 suitors and none of them had such a small dowry. And so we parted, and they said, “Come to an agreement and everything will be fine. We all liked the lad, and we hear that he is a good one but too poor”. We came home and I started pleading with the dad, crying, asking him to give me at least a quarter so that things would be OK. But nothing worked. I answered the widow and could not think of anything but how to make this work. I met the girl on Sunday, I asked her again what her relatives said. And she says, “The mother is fine with your dowry, and I am not even asking for that dowry. But the dad and the brothers-in-law said that you are too poor”. But uncle Mikhialo was in Canada, with one son-in-law, so he started talking about me and praising me, and the uncle later met the old man, i.e. the father-in-law, and said to him something like that, “Take him in, a land is a land, but he has a brother in Canada who would not return back; he will give his land as a gift to Fedir, besides he sends them money”. He started persuading the old man, and the old man said,

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“Well, tell the lad to come to me, I will talk to him about something else”. They had that conversation on Sunday and the uncle told me about it on Sunday, and on Tuesday I went to the father-in-law. I came, and the old man says, “Boy, we all like you but it is bad that you are hell of a lot poor. Your uncle told me that your brother might give you his land as a gift, so write to your brother, ask him to gift it to you or at least that you would work on his land till he returns. Maybe he will not return, for I hear that he is a big shot”. – I say, “That’s true. He may give me his land, I think he will; and he does not forget about us – he sends money, and he sent a nice gift for Mikhial and so on”.
And the old man says, “Fine, let the God’s will be; if the girl decided so, then let it be. If the brother maybe gives you his land for a couple of years, and sometimes will send you some dollars – then may God bless you”. And that’s what we talked on Tuesday about, and the following Sunday the father-in-law came to us and said to my dad, “Let’s do the wedding. Be what God wishes to be”. And then one Saturday we went to a priest and wrote down commandments, and we rushed the wedding, for there were such people who wished to break it. And I encouraged the girl so well that she cried in front of her relatives to marry her off to me, and her relatives granted her wish.
Now, dear Dmytryk, be so kind, write to me and advise. I got married with your help. I have now

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three morgens of land, and after the in-laws’ death I will have only two left, because one morgen will be given to two daughters.
Now, Dmytryk, do me a favour. Write to the father – let him give you your land. And you give it to me to at least work on it for one-two years. If you cannot take the land, then at least write such a letter that I could read to the in-laws to show that there is a hope, so that I would not have troubles. Another thing, be so kind, Dmytryk, a land is a land, whether it will work out or not, I do not know, but I ask you to please lend me a couple of dollars. I give you, brother, my word of honour that I will return the money when I am well-adjusted here. I came to know that I have some debts but the old man thinks that everything is the way we discussed before. Dmytryk, be so kind, if you can borrow me at least 10 dollars, so that I could at least support my words with something. Do that for me, Dmytro, I will always remember that. I am good so far. We all like each other and everything is good, but the father-in-law says, “Write to your brother, let him send you what you asked for”. We are now uncertain here. Dmytryk, I described you everything in this letter like it was happening in real life. Don’t be mad at me that I am asking to lend me money. It’s not about the money, brother, but it’s about making true what I said before the wedding. Dmytryk, both me and my wife are wishing you all the best in life. Your brother Fedor and brother’s wife, Vasiuta Macko.

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